Matthew 25:1-13
The Parable of the Ten Bridesmaids. Now there’s a story that really bugs me. It seems riddled with inconsistencies and
conundrums. As a child, I was taught to
be a wise bridesmaid, always prepared – kind of a Boy Scout approach to understanding
the story. But really? This puts salvation dangerously close to
works righteousness, all about what I do, not what Jesus did. Just stock up on oil and I’m good to go, the
gates of heaven will open wide.
Then there’s the selfishness of the wise bridesmaids. What oil vendor is open at midnight and who
sends her friends off to find it at such a time, especially when there is extra
oil at hand? Later, when the five return
and knock on the door, and the bridegroom says he does not know them, why
didn’t those wise ones intervene and speak for their friends? This sounds more like Survivor Island than
the kingdom of heaven.
Most perplexing, who shouted at midnight? All ten women had fallen asleep. Who was watching? Who had spotted the bridegroom?
As I read, re-read, and researched this passage, my thoughts
have continued to swirl. There are some
really interesting, and some kind of kooky, understandings of this story. But I think the key question, and the one
that unlocks it for me, is:
Where is the bride?
It’s a wedding after all.
We have a bridegroom, bridesmaids, and a banquet hall. There has to be a bride in here
somewhere. Is she the one who called out
at midnight? It’s most likely the bride
would be the most excited, watching and waiting no matter how long for her
beloved to arrive.
This reminds me of two beautiful brides who have blessed me with
the role of MOB. I have treasured
memories of watching them plan and prepare and equip everyone so the wedding
celebration was a joyous occasion for all.
Brides can often be depicted as vain and selfish, but I think the
opposite is the case. In their attention
to detail and their meticulous preparation, they are thinking of their
guests. Will the menu work for everyone?
Is transportation accessible and does everyone know the route to get to the
right places at the right times? Special
consideration is given to the bridesmaids – what do they need? Where will they stay? Where will they get ready? Do they need help with hair and make-up? What about cover-ups and flip-flops? Water
bottles? Child care? On and on.
The bride is the heavy lifter when it comes to a successful wedding
feast.
So where is this bride and what is she doing throughout this
story? Why didn’t the bridesmaids have
enough oil to keep watch as long as needed?
If they did have to forage for their own oil, why isn’t the bride as
anxiously awaiting their return as she anticipated her bridegroom’s arrival?
How could the banquet start without the entire party? It makes me want to scream – that just isn’t
right. This whole story stinks.
Until. Until I look
in the mirror. Oops. Who is the bride? It’s me.
It’s you. It’s all of us in the
Church. Might this parable be our
wake-up call?
Are we waiting and watching?
The hour is unknown, but when the bridegroom arrives, will we be ready
and waiting? Not like the sandwich-board
guy proclaiming the end is near. This is
an active waiting. Feeding the
sheep. Fighting for justice. Caring for widows and orphans. Walking humbly. Being faithful stewards of all the good gifts
we have been given.
Are we equipping and caring?
Do our bridesmaids have what they need?
Not in an in-your-face evangelizing way.
But in a true love-your-neighbor way.
Do we listen for those in need around us? Do we offer a hug, a meal, a safe place for
people to tell their stories and share their narratives? Do we seek together our common humanity and
acknowledge each person’s uniqueness? Do
we suspend judgment and fill empty spaces with grace?
Are we talking to the bridegroom about our bridesmaids in
anticipation of the big party just around the corner? Why does the bridegroom
not know these five women? Has the bride
never mentioned her dear friends? Are we
praying for our loved ones, our friends, our neighbors, our enemies – bringing
them to God in our conversations with Him?
Praying for them in the deepest way, not that our will be done, but that
God’s will be done in their lives.
Regardless of their relationship with God, we know God so God should
have heard about them from us. No one
needs to be left outside of this celebration.
God has given us, the Church, the starring role in this
sacred story. In our life as the Church,
our witness to love can be so strong that even those who don’t know the
Bridegroom ask to be included in the festivities. So we must always be on alert - are we, the
Bride, preparing an inclusive, come-one-come-all feast? Are we open to and aware of the needs of
those around us? Are we bringing extra oil
to be shared with all – even those who don’t know they need it? We, the Church, as community, as the bride of
Christ, are the living answer to an on-going mystery in the lead-up to an
awesome banquet when the two shall become one.
I don’t think this is the end of the parable, but more like
a dramatic pause – breathless suspense giving the Bride time to show up. God is calling the Church on earth to be his
Bride and to do the heavy lifting. But if, like the bride in this parable, we
fail miserably, our Bridegroom will not and cannot fail. We know this Bridegroom and He cannot leave
things this way. So I see Jesus looking
around the table, first at the bridesmaids, then at the Bride and saying
something like “Really? Are you just
going to sit there? Someone open the
door.”